My turtle suddenly stopped moving. I nudge it, and it won’t even blink. I tried everything just to get a reaction out of it. It’s official, my turtle’s dead.

It looked really sick the previous days. I saw it was dying, but there was nothing I could do for it. I don’t know how to deal with these situations. I was hoping my Emergency Response Training Course would kick in, but there was no way I could diagnose the problem.

I tried my best to clean up its tank and provide sufficient food for it, and give it an occassional back rub. I knew it was coming, but I wasn’t ready for it at all. I broke down when I came home to find it lying there just sticking out of its tiny shell. I’m PMSing at a very bad time.

Although many suggested I flush it down the toilet, I simply couldn’t bear the thought. I asked Sin, my roomy,  to dispose of the body in a dignified way. The next day I came home to find the tank empty. Sin said she buried it somewhere on the beach. I was relieved but then, disturbing thoughts creeped in.

What if it wasn’t dead? I didn’t even check for it’s vital signs. I didn’t attempt CPR. I didn’t defibrilate. I just gave up on it & declared it dead. What if it were only in a coma? And then it’ll wake up to find itself six feet under!! I can’t even bring myself to finish the scenario in my head. I gotta stop.

As a tribute to my turtle, I’m going to hum Mariah Carey’s new song Bye Bye - not the original one, but the remix.